I still think about all the stuff that happened last year. I hate thinking about it but it just pops into my head and won't go away. I think about me and you and how I thought everything was perfect - but you thought differently. People say to not blame her because it wasn't her fault everything that happened - then who do I blame? Yeah I blame her because if she didn't like you so much none of it would have happened in the first place... I'm still confused about the truth but I just let it slide because I know you don't like talking about it.
Whenever I have an argument with someone who is also your friend, I start worrying. This is when I start thinking back to last year. I'm scared of losing you to her again. I know you weren't with her today but that doesn't matter. You're close to the other one and she's "best buddies" with her. I don't want you to be taken away from me again like that because it was horrible. Standing with the other guys I kept on looking over at you and it felt like you weren't going to look back. I don't know why you didn't come over - I guess I was just jealous that you were with her, when I wanted you to be with me.... Guess I can't have my own way all the time. And you have your own friends to see....
Lunch was amazing. I loved it. Just being with you - in your arms. Hugging you, kissing you and tickling you... I didn't want it to end I was having so much fun. I forgave you a little for not coming over at break, but then you go again and I'm really happy for half an hour, but when it is deadly silent in class I start thinking of all the different possibilities that could happen. And I just hope that they don't....
I love you. You blonde hair, blue eyed freak :) and I wouldn't change you for the world xxxxxxxxx
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